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Chairman's Chat
05 July 2013

Someone once said that revenge is a dish best served cold. Well, we don't take revenge on anyone...as those who have experienced The Secklow LoveĀ© are more than aware, Secklow are perennial lovers not fighters. And don't we just love better than everyone else...? We're a big bundle of collective hugs and kisses, and that's a priceless commodity when most others deal in beating, thrashing, grunting and spanking. (Ok, some of our club may deal in a little grunting and spanking, but it's behind closed doors and is entirely consensual...)

But this weekend is most definitely not going to be cold. Execalibre ordered the weather and, my goodness, it looks like those ridiculous sun-dances might actually work. Photos of Secklow versions are on the internet somewhere - #tightpurpleandgorgeous (be careful with the google search on that one).

The question is this: who is going to have the most ridiculous tan come 5.30pm on Sunday evening? We are all victims of "paddlers tan" at some time or another. A Chairman's suggestion is that the Secklow lovelies might actually have to be riding those waves in skins this time round, rather than the usual maroon majesticness. Admittedly none of the lovelies know about the skins idea, but it will go down well with EVERYONE. It is a bit like Brad Pitt: all the ladies would get jiggy; and all the guys actually think that he's not a bad looker...might like a beer...he's done ok for himself, all things considered...and he's quite a good actor in Snatch.

So, where do we go from here? Metaphorically, we dump Brad Pitt because (let's face it) we have more to offer. He simply couldn't cope. It'd be like asking a Coalition to run the country properly. In practical terms...well, we sneak to the M4, make a little diversion down the back-street known as the M5, find a campsite called Kennford...and hit the beers in preparation for a little Sunday spanking.

Bring it on


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